Saturday, November 18, 2017

1117; That One Dream

Bismillah.

I woke up from a dream wishing really hard that it will just be a dream. But few weeks later, that one dream that I prayed really hard to not come true, came true.

I'll long for your soft voice, warm smiles and your goodbye waves at the door everytime I leave. I should've hugged you a bit more tighter when we last met. Kakak Qiha sayang nenek.

Innalillah,
Hajah Saniah Rakiman
1939- 16 November 2017


Monday, November 13, 2017

1116; I'm Sorry

Bismillah.

I feel like the worst friend ever for not being there at times they need me most. I really wish someone told me something so that I don't always have to be that stupid-clueless-the-last-person-to-know friend. Heck distance hurts.

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Saturday, November 4, 2017

1115; Today's Blessings (Kind Elderly)

Bismillah.

The bus that I rode on today stopped at one of the bus stops and an old man entered. Before he could even sit down, the bus already moved so the inertia almost made that poor man fall down. My reflex action had me handing out my hand to catch that man if he falls but alhamdulillah he managed to stay balanced. He said 'sorry' and some few words to me but honestly I didn't understand any so I just smiled. 

When the bus arrived at the final destination, I just sat at my seat and waited for everyone to get out first. When no one's left in front of me, I looked behind to see if there's anyone and I saw the old man from earlier smiling and had his hand gestured as if to allow me to walk before he does. I insisted him to walk first coz I thought it would be impolite for me to have that man walking behind me but yeah, he won haha. I thanked him for being such a gentleman. Maybe that's a way of him showing his gratitude. 

I swear the elders here are so so so nice. This wasn't the first time I experienced such nice act. 

One time, I was descending the stairs from the upper deck of the bus but then have to stop mid-stairs to wait for everyone from the lower deck to get down first. I was the last person from the upper deck so I don't really mind having to wait for everyone. I mean, what's the rush. 

Finally it came to the last person, an elder woman, to get down but she was just standing there looking at me with a smile. She asked me to get down first and to be polite, I insisted that she should go first. Maybe it's because she saw me standing at the stairs for quite a while. After playing some osom and ojus, I finally got down first after thanking her a lot for her sweet gesture. Honestly my day was brighter because of her.

Another time, the bus I wanted to get on arrived at the bus station and in a blink of an eye, everyone was already forming a queue. I was just trying to find the end of the queue when suddenly an old woman approached me and told me to just queue in front of her. I mean seriously ah auntie???  It was a long queue and I couldn't just simply cut everyone else's queue...... and stand in front of a woman older that me.......??? I was so touched by her action but rejected her request politely.

Brb crying guys, why is everyone so nice to meeee?? Just when I thought home is so far away, Allah sent me a whole bunch of super nice strangers to make me feel like home. I'm starting to like this place. The elderly here is so nice. Allah is so nice.

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1114; Today's Blessings (A Thank You)

Bismillah.

This week, I was too affected by so many things- little things that went big inside my head. Many times that I didn't feel appreciated, but it was just my feelings tho. I reckon that all these overthinking drained the energy out of me so I just brush off all those feelings coz I thought it shouldn't overwhelm me too much. Plus, I have bigger things to work on now :p

Today, I was walking to class using a shortcut when suddenly a man from opposite my way wanted to walk the same path too. Only one people could walk at the footpath at a time so I gave my way to him first.

I didn't even look at him and just instinctively gave way but suddenly he said 'thank you' to me. I was lil bit surprised by the words so I look up and saw that he was saying that directly in my eyes. Cheers, I replied..

I did that just out of common sense but felt so so appreciated by the gesture. I almost thought that my day would pass by with me being stressed by a computer test and a late evening lecture, but then this man came cross my life for few seconds just to make my day.

On a side note, I should really work out my mouth to say my thank you's and sorry's more often- who knows that I'll be that stranger who makes someone's day.

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Wednesday, November 1, 2017

1113, Today's Blessings (Steve Harvey & Kind Dog Owner)

Bismillah

Today I finally know the real name of Steve Harvey. It's Richard. For all this time I've been calling him Steve Harvey in my head because he legit looks like Steve Harvey from the Little Big Shots show hahaha. We didn't even bother to ask each other's name every time we talked tho, prolly coz I think remembering names are such burden especially when they remember mine but I didnt remember theirs- so I prefer knowing people without their names lol. And Richard almost made a curse word out of my name but sokay, I get that a lot /cries/

So today after class, I told Richard that I'm going to the railway station to buy a railcard and he was concerned that my layers are not enough. He suggested that I bring a scarf in my bag every time, so when it's too cold outside, I can just pull it out and wear it. Awh Richard, the advice itself already made me feel so warm.

At the park, on my way to the railway station, suddenly I have to walk past an old woman with her dog. I was so scared because the woman was holding the dog's leash quite loosely and I was afraid that the dog would go near me. Guys, I can't even handle a cat, what even a dog.......

I alarmed the woman by saying 'Sorry, I'm afraid of dogs' and the woman said 'It's alright' while tightening the leash. The woman was so kind to say that to me because this happened to me many times but usually the dog owners would just pull their dog and say nothing. Basically her 'It's alright' just made my day. If only she knows how her little deed means so much to me.

This was my second time going to the railway station, but this time, alone. I had to remember my way to the place and alhamdulillah, it isn't as far as I thought. Thank God I've been there with Raihan before this. I was quite lost AT the station coz I didn't know at which entrance should I go in or which counter should I buy the railcard. One important thing that I learnt here is, you're gonna be lost forever if you don't ask around. So I asked a random guy standing in front of the station and alhamdulillah had found my way.

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